The body is able to reflect the inner experiences of a person. If a person ignores such body signals for help and does not eliminate the cause of the experience, he is doomed to wear masks all his life, hoping that the problem will disappear on its own and fears will evaporate. The trauma of the abandoned occurs at an early age and arises due to a lack of attention from side of a parent of the opposite sex. The child believes that the father / mother does not show the slightest interest in him. Because of this, a person creates a mask of the dependent – a creature that needs love and support.
A person with childhood abandonment trauma is characterized by a lack of muscle tone. Thus, the body seems to be saying: “I need help and support, I cannot hold myself.” The legs and arms of these people are long and weak, and their eyes are sad, the whole image gives the impression of complete helplessness. A person with this syndrome often has a problem with where to put their hands, especially when they are looking at them.
The trauma of the abandoned: how it manifests itself in the physique
Often, an addict with an abandoned injury has a twisted back, it seems that the spine is not able to hold it. When such a person is standing, he is constantly looking for something to lean on, and when a loved one is nearby – holds his hand or cuddles. During a walk, the addict always lets everyone go ahead, preferring to be the follower.
Distinguishing features of people with childhood abandonment trauma:
- slender physique;
- muscle flabbiness;
- soreness (prone to bronchitis, back pain, migraine, diabetes, depression, myopia).
How the trauma of the abandoned person affects the behavior of the person
The addicts often create problems for themselves, they want to be a victim in order to get attention. Such a person often dramatizes and exaggerates the problem.
A person with abandonment trauma has difficulty making decisions and often turns to others for advice. People of this type are characterized by sharp mood swings – a smile and a perky laugh can instantly turn into sadness.
The addict often asks a lot of questions and changes to a childish voice when asking for help. It is quite difficult for such people to accept refusal and they often use blackmail and manipulation. The behavior of a person with an abandoned trauma is always built in such a way as to avoid loneliness. He tries to do everything in order to be loved and never abandoned, an eloquent example of such behavior are women who endure mockery from their partners and even forgive assault.
Dependent people often let out tears and blame others for leaving them, thereby causing pain. A person with a trauma of abandonment often falls into anxiety states, which are accompanied by a rapid heartbeat, nausea, shortness of breath.
How to get rid of the childhood trauma of the abandoned
The first step is to build a relationship with your parents, thanks to this you can stop repeating the same pattern of passing the trauma of the abandoned from generation to generation in your family.
- Recognize and accept. When you created a mask for yourself as an addict, it helped you adjust to the situation. It is important to realize your problem and change your behavior, get rid of masks. Only by realizing your childhood trauma and accepting it is it possible to get rid of the trauma of the abandoned. By loving your wounds you can heal them.
- Accept everything that you fear from others and how you reproach them. When you suffer from the trauma of an abandoned person, it is intensified every time you leave an important matter, do not pay attention to a loved one, or do not take care of yourself enough.
- Let go of anger at your parents. Every time you experience the suffering you experienced as a child, you begin to sympathize with the child within you. It is important to let go of anger at your parents and forgive them for everything – this is the only way to get rid of this childhood trauma.
Love yourself, learn to be yourself and enjoy the moments when you have the opportunity to be alone with yourself.
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