Imagine how wonderful it would be if the people to whom you are trying to convey your point of view agreed with you and listened to your opinion. To implement this plan, it is enough to master the art of persuasion – techniques and techniques that help to convince a person and inspire him with confidence – so communication will be more productive and useful.
The art of persuasion: how to create the right environment
Reasonable conversation should take place in a certain environment – so there are more chances to understand the interlocutor and to be understood yourself. This will help you tune in to communication and use persuasion methods.
- Atmosphere. Noise, waiters running around, screaming children are unlikely to contribute to establishing contact. To use the art of persuasion, all irritants must be avoided.
- Look into my eyes. It was found that during a conversation, eye contact should take up 25-75% of the time. At the same time, you should not look at a person for more than 10 seconds – this may alert him. If you completely avoid eye contact with the interlocutor, he may think that you are trying to deceive him.
- Open posture. To convince a person, take the correct posture. This means that you should not cross your arms and legs, lower your head. Also, a fairly effective method of persuasion is the adoption of a pose that "mirrors" position of the interlocutor.
- Courtesy and compliments. So that pleasant words do not seem to the interlocutor as inappropriate flattery, mark the merits not of your counterpart, but of what is really dear to him (remember what kind of darling his favorite cat, for example).
To flatter a person competently, try using the minus-plus method. First you make a person doubt your positive qualities, and then you reinforce his self-confidence. It is important not to overdo it with the “minus”, because then no “pluses” will no longer help to eliminate the unpleasant aftertaste.
- “I-messages”. Instead of immediately complaining “You are always late! How much can you do?”, it is better to say “When you are late, I am very worried, because I do not know what could happen to you. I would be very pleased if they called me in such cases”.
How to convince a person at the subconscious level
To prevent the person you are talking to from convicting you of manipulation, try to influence his subconscious directly.
Control your voice. Undoubtedly, the main weapon in a conversation is the voice. Lillian Glass, an American communication specialist, in his book I Read Minds emphasizes that those with loud and high voices are often perceived as manipulators and nervous personalities, and quiet ones are annoying.
Say his/her name more often. Dale Carnegio noted that the sound of one's own name evokes positive emotions in a person, because it is – a sign of attention to the individual, and not to status or rank. At the same time, do not forget to follow how you pronounce the name of the interlocutor – this should be done in a penetrating voice.
Grow the value of the person. This method of persuasion works flawlessly. Use phrases such as: "I would like to consult with you", "No one but you can tell", "I know that I can trust you". So the interlocutor can feel like a real expert and will happily continue the conversation.
Communicate the most important things at the beginning and at the end of the conversation. To convince a person, tell him the most important information for you at the beginning and at the end of the conversation – words spoken during this period are best perceived and remembered. This phenomenon is called the “edge effect” and was discovered back in 1885 by the German psychologist Hermann Ebbinghaus.
Give real life examples. To convince a person of something, try to give examples from the lives of acquaintances or referring to the experience of authoritative persons.
The interlocutor must see that you are really interested in communicating with him, for this use the method “reflective listening”:
- Summarize (“So it would be better if you quit?”);
- voice the other person's feelings ("You must have been very embarrassed at that moment");
- try to rephrase what you heard in your own words (“It turns out that you definitely decided (a) to change your occupation?”);
- ask clarifying questions, find out the details.
The Art of Persuasion – something that has helped many people succeed and owning it is insanely important. Using the techniques described in the article, you will be able to convince a person that you are right and learn to win over others.
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