How to get rid of shortcomings and believe in yourself (video)

A real woman is not just well aware of her shortcomings. She works on everything that she does not like about herself: she corrects what is possible and accepts the incorrigible. In order for your efforts not to be in vain, embarking on the path of change, it is important to understand the sources of self-motivation and correctly evaluate your own resources. In this article, we will talk about how to get rid of shortcomings and become the best version of yourself.

How to get rid of shortcomings: set goals and look for motivation

1. Set a goal

Having passed the test to determine the features of your appearance, you have identified your own shortcomings and, it would seem, you know what to work on. But not everything is so simple. The first and extremely important part of the work on the shortcomings – goal setting. Believe me, how your goal is formulated depends on what efforts you will have to spend to achieve it and whether it will be achieved at all.

A well-defined goal meets several criteria:

• attractiveness;
• Your goal and the state to which its realization will lead should inspire you.  

Think of words that can emphasize the benefits of achieving the goal. Use positive expressions (not "get rid of hair loss", but "have strong hair").

Change the words "should" or "should" to the verbs "want" and "will do".

Attractive, inspiring, tempting goal statement in itself carries a powerful positive charge and is a resource for achieving it. For example, the goal “I must get rid of cellulite on the buttocks” sounds sad, but “I will have smooth, firm buttocks” is tempting!   –      –        complex and unpleasant, but     –     

Written form. Your goal to get rid of shortcomings must be written down. In a notebook, diary, computer – doesn't matter. It is important that the formulated and written goal from the category of fruitless dreams passes into the status of a conscious intention. Which means – is many times more likely to be implemented. 

Specific . A goal without clear deadlines and a formulated concrete result looks again like an ephemeral desire. So, its achievement is very doubtful. Therefore, not "I want to lose weight", but "I want to have such and such a weight by such and such a date." 

Reachable. You should not try to lose 10 kilograms in two weeks, grow 15 cm by summer, or become wise the day after tomorrow (wisdom comes with age or does not come at all). If the goal is not achieved, you will be disappointed, at best you will feel remorse, or even want to leave the path of self-improvement. Therefore, start from your personal initial data and work only with what you can influence. For example, not "grow 15 cm", but "work out a graceful walk in 15 cm heels."  

Sequence. Mammoth must be eaten in parts. And Big Goals – divide into small sub-goals and tasks and consistently achieve them, keeping in mind the inspiring image of Big  Goals. 

2. Find motivation

The very goal of getting rid of shortcomings, if it is formulated attractively, already motivates to achieve it. Repeat the wording to yourself or out loud as

affirmation. Imagine yourself achieving what you set out to do.

Feel yourself in a new quality, in a new image – how you will think, what to say, how to communicate with others, how they will react to you – the more you can imagine the details of the life of the New You, the better. Fix this state. And try to return to it whenever your determination and self-confidence need energy recharge.

Photos and videos of beautiful women (for example, with the hair of your dreams), athletes (with embossed abs), actresses, models, as well as your own photo where you really like yourself will help you create a visual image. Also you can use Internet services to model your self-image, for example, a "weight mirror".

The help of the environment

– is also an important factor. It is much easier to move in the right direction if your family, friends and colleagues support you. It is even better if there are like-minded people among them, with whom you can always discuss difficulties or compete if there is not enough internal drive. 

Oxana Schmidt, expert of the Estet-portal, love-coach, told us about the motivation to achieve goals, the formation of beauty habits and the "mental diet". VIDEO:

3. Estimate Resources

In order to minimize the chances of failure, it is important to assess the resources you will need to achieve the result "on the shore". After all, free time, food, the ability to be lazy, indulging spontaneous desires – all these little joys of today make up the safe and comfortable "comfort zone" you are in right now. Work on oneself, self-development requires a mandatory exit from the comfort zone. That is, something will have to be sacrificed. 

Are you ready to "sell" evening cakes for a flat stomach? How about sacrificing a TV show for yoga for flexibility? How about replacing a long morning lying in bed with a visit to the beautician? What about the redistribution of funds in favor of good cosmetics and beautiful things? And if at the same time you also have to cook the steamed vegetables yourself? But don't worry! Your life will not turn into a joyless ascetic existence. It's just time for new pleasures. 

4. Create a system of new pleasures

Think over and write down those useful (or at least harmless) things that make you happy and increase your energy level.   It can be sports, sleep, sex, music, dancing, talking with a girlfriend, walking, simple healthy food, meditation. And also – of course, visible results.

Learn to enjoy every lost kilogram and shortened centimeter, new complexion, changed skin texture, shine of hair. It motivates for further work like nothing else. 

Record the results. Photos will allow you to evaluate the changes in those angles from which you do not see yourself in the mirror. Video recording will help track improvements in facial expressions, gestures and speech – if you are working on these components of your image. 

Don't worry. Your new lifestyle won't always be so uncomfortable. Habits – including useful – produced within 21 days. So in three weeks you will surely feel better. 

Sometimes – but only SOMETIMES! – you need to allow yourself and habitual harmful pleasures. This preventive technique allows you to minimize disruptions.  

5. How to respond to breakdowns?

It happens to everyone. Skip a workout, be too lazy to apply a mask to your hair, oversleep a run, be tempted by a roll or smoke a cigarette at a party – All of this will certainly make us feel guilty. And what happened to him? Self-flagellation, reduced self-esteem, self-disappointment, despondency and decreased motivation for further achievements. Somehow not constructive, right? Therefore, it is very important to remember that there are no achievements without mistakes. It is important to be able to rise after a fall. 

The first thing you need after a breakdown – forgiveness. Don't blame yourself and don't attack. Everything is fine. You did not want this and are not going to repeat it. Then analyze the reasons for the breakdown. Perhaps your diet is too strict? Maybe you missed your run because you worked late the night before?

Have you eaten a bun because you missed lunch? Find out the cause of the breakdown and try to prevent the circumstances that provoked it from now on – whether it be indiscipline or, on the contrary, excessive severity. Balance and healthy pleasures will help you avoid embarrassing failures in the future.

And remember: a breakdown in itself will not lead to anything terrible. Main – so that failures do not deprive you of motivation to get rid of shortcomings and do not turn into a system.

6. Accept what you can't change.

Surely among your shortcomings there are those that cannot be corrected. This does not mean that you should give up. You need to work on accepting yourself with them, incorrigible. Realize that your shortcomings – as important a part of your uniqueness as your dignity. All this – You, unique and wonderful. 

Thank your body for having it. For being able to move and touch. For what gives you an inner feeling of lightness or pleasant muscle fatigue. For making you feel alive and so much like your mother, father or grandmother. 

Accept your body as a gift – nature, God, your parents. Accept it with love and gratitude, beyond stereotypes, norms and limits. As a given. 

Our advice will help you to easily get rid of your shortcomings and finally gain self-confidence.