Some people think that optimism — it is an innate quality of the human character. And others are sure that optimism can be brought up and nurtured in a person, especially if you start from an early age. Neither the first nor the second point of view has been scientifically proven. However, psychologists say that it is absolutely necessary to fight children's blues and pessimism if you do not want to raise a depressed adult member of society.
How to deal with children's pessimism? How to raise a child to be an optimist and a happy person? Read the article estet-portal.com!
How to raise a happy child
Psychologists have proven that children's blues and apathy in relation to the outside world are more common in those children and adolescents whose parents themselves suffer from depression. And the point here is not heredity at all, but rather the fact that it is difficult to look at the always sad, self-absorbed mother (or father) and at the same time maintain a joyful mood at such a sensitive and vulnerable age.
Child psychologists explain: the worldview (both optimistic and pessimistic) is laid just in childhood with the help of imitation and imprinting mechanisms (fixation of important behavior patterns learned from the closest people). No wonder they say that children are like a sponge — absorb everything that is needed and not needed.
It is believed that all babies are naturally happy and optimistic. And sad pessimists and losers of them are just made by life and the environment, the most important part of which are parents.
So if you really want to raise your child to be happy, start with yourself. As long as you are unhappy, you will not be able to make your child so.
It is important to remember here that actions play a much greater role than words. If you tell your offspring one thing and do the opposite, the child may lose trust in adults.
Keep in mind that children on a subconscious level always perfectly feel the mood of their parents. If they are always tense and prepare for the worst scenarios, then the child will be on the alert, will be afraid of the world around him and consider it hostile, because such a model was laid in him by the closest people.
And, of course, in raising happy children has its tricks, as well as other aspects of parenting science.
What to do if the child is scared
First of all, one should not dismiss children's fears as something insignificant, and certainly one should not reproach a child for "cowardice" and the absurdity of fear.
Just always find time for a heart-to-heart talk. The vast majority of our very important adult affairs will take half an hour if you put them aside and calm your child. The child must be sure that he can always (always!) turn to his parents for support and always receive it.
Tell your child honestly, do not hide from him that there really are bad and unpleasant things in the world. But at the same time, focus on the fact that there are no less beautiful, wonderful things that make life worth living for.
You can find your own soothing phrase (like "There is always a way out"), which in the future will serve as a "beacon" for a grown child in the raging sea of \u200b\u200blife, will calm him down.
What should I do if my child is upset?
Can't deal with baby tears with conventional methods of comfort and reassurance? Try to offer your child the so-called positive reference — a kind of family ritual that will always cheer up all family members.
For example, tell jokes or funny stories, discuss upcoming holidays or plans for the weekend. Anything that will allow you to switch the attention of the child and allow him to understand that there is more good and kindness in the world than situations that lead to tears.
Humor — the best means to neutralize any negative emotion (this also applies to fear, too). A child with an optimistic view of the world will be confident in himself and in his ability to cope with difficulties along the way.
What to do if parents are not in the mood
Of course, all parents — living people who also experience negative emotions from time to time and cannot accumulate them in themselves, hiding from household members. Otherwise, it is fraught with huge health problems.
But how to make it clear to children that even in this case, the sincerity of feelings and emotions — Is that better than a fake smile on your face? Moreover, children instantly catch the bad mood of their relatives and can even blame themselves for this.
It's all just — sincere sincere conversation with the child. Explain that adults sometimes feel sad, and that this is normal. Emphasize that the child is not to blame.
However, you should not share your problems with your offspring in detail, so as not to bring up a neurasthenic. Just after a short conversation, ask the child to give you some time to relax alone. If possible, transfer care of the child to the second parent for this time, if everything is fine with his condition.
Remember that the goal of raising a child to be an optimist does not mean that they need to be shielded from the world and hard encounters with reality. It is impossible to become an optimist without facing setbacks and learning to overcome them and move on.
The main thing is that your child knows that he can always turn to his parents for advice and support. Then any situation will be up to him, and you will grow a happy child!
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