Probably, each of us, having our own children, at least once visited the thought: "Am I raising my own child correctly?" Sometimes we begin to doubt what advice to give our baby, what to do in a critical situation? Looking at the children of the neighborhood, for some reason it is always clear where there are omissions in education, but with your own children, not everything is so clear. Let's see what mistake parents can make? Is it worth it to indulge children in everything? What example to choose to follow? And is it worth it?
Remove the rose-colored glasses from the children
What parent would not want a child not to fill his bumps, but to learn solely from his mistakes? Therefore, out of good intentions, we try to protect our child from unnecessary worries and suffering. By doing this, we deprive the child of correctly interpreting the situations that occur around.
You need to understand that children learn exclusively from their own experience, so that adults do not say. Therefore, if a child peels off his knees – this is normal. Having not experienced negative experience, he becomes dependent and acquires various phobias and fears.
Don't decide everything for the children
A child cannot adapt to adulthood if all questions are decided for him by his beloved parent. It is necessary to give him the opportunity to find a way out of critical situations. Then he will not get lost and panic in case of force majeure.
He develops creative thinking and a creative approach, trying to figure out the situation on his own, emphasizes estet-portal.com. All you need is advice (if asked) and observation from the outside.
Undeserved praise – spoils the baby
If a child is constantly praised, he will think that everything he does – great, even if it's not really true. This is one of the biggest mistakes parents make. You are depriving the child in this way of achieving really high results in any field. After all, for the work "slipshod", you will also praise him. And at school, he will wonder why only parents like what he does. And the rest think that he is mediocrity.
If you see a flaw, you can say: "It's great, but I know you can do better." It seems that the praise remains, and there is also a call to action. Then, over time, the child will begin to look at things objectively and not be offended by fair criticism.
You can say "no" to children
Don't be afraid to forbid something to children, but within reason. If you cannot pay attention to the baby or he asks for something that he cannot, you need to learn to refuse in a soft way. Necessarily – explain the reason for the refusal. Because the categorical “no” is perceived as a command, and not as a request.
The child must know the limits of his "want" and learn to show empathy if you can't make time for it, for an important reason (such as being unwell).
Parents' mistake: not sharing their experiences
Be sure to talk about when you were little, what you felt, how you experienced different events. In adolescence, it is very important to give the direction in which the child will go next. He will definitely not listen to moralizing, but he can take your own experience into service.
Children must be ready to enter the world with all its realities, and it will be better if they are armed with the necessary information.
Smart child – does not mean experienced
If a child studies well and succeeds in additional sections, this does not mean that he is already ready to take responsibility for his actions. Do not flatter yourself that he is already ready to go through life on his own and make important decisions.
However, there is another side to the coin. Perhaps you, by your behavior, make him less independent. Try to watch his peers. What tasks are they capable of doing? This way you will better understand that your baby is already ripe for more adult decisions and actions (for example, going to the store or doing homework without your supervision).
Own example – the best
The main mistake of parents – try to raise a better copy of yourself in a child. They want the child to be smarter, to know more languages, to achieve high results in all endeavors. However, this does not happen. Whatever efforts we make, the model of behavior in society is laid down in the family, and the child will follow this model for the rest of his life.
Therefore, if you want your baby to grow up healthy – go in for sports, he will definitely catch up with you. If you want him to reach heights in school, your career and achievements will be an example for him, and so on in everything.
Add a comment