Loneliness – this is not a status, not a marital status, but a feeling of worrying about oneself, as forgotten, misunderstood, rejected. After all, not being married, living a full-fledged social or spiritual life & nbsp; does not mean being lonely at all. And it is also possible to have a family and feel globally alone.

Another family therapist, Whittaker, wrote: "If you can't stand being alone, don't get married." Thus, loneliness – it is the feeling of being alone. There is a positive moment of loneliness when we retire in order to understand ourselves, listen to our desires and needs, and just relax. And the negative one consists in a painful experience, burdened with sadness, self-pity, "eating" yourself, a feeling of rejection and isolation, when you want to get rid of this feeling, but for some reason it doesn’t work out.           

Recently, loneliness has taken the form of a social problem. It lies in the fact that a huge number of women (and men) do not marry, do not seek emotional attachments, communicate little, lock themselves in the gap between home and work, call others only on business. And at the same time, society is tolerant of male loneliness, while female loneliness is perceived suspiciously and with condemnation. If a woman is not married, then something is wrong with her. Of course, there are many reasons for this phenomenon, but we will consider a few of the main ones. 

Fear of rejection

This reason is based on a feeling of inferiority, low self-esteem. Usually a fantasy is created in your head that you are not interesting to another person, that you will definitely be rejected, that you need to “pull up” a little more. your horizons, and then you will begin to communicate. 

Inflated requirements

In our time of intellectualization and social success, many women make excessive demands on the candidacy of a life partner. He must be smart, and handsome, and successful, and rich, so that next to him not to feel his superiority. At the same time, women are actively engaged in the development of their personality, so that it would certainly be impossible to meet the right man. And even if you meet such an “ideal image”, he often cannot be caring, reliable, etc. So maybe you should not look for an ideal, but go down from heaven to earth and look at real people? 

Fear of family relationships

It usually arises from previous life experiences. This may be the experience of the parental family or their previous family life. Often only negative aspects are taken out of this experience (constant quarrels, dissatisfaction, burden of relationships, etc.). And now the woman is afraid to enter into a relationship again, not even imagining that everything could be different.         

What to do? You need to start with yourself. In order not to feel loneliness, you need to figure out where its roots grow from. It is also very important to be active, not to wait until you get a call or take an interest in your affairs, but to take the initiative on your own. By showing interest and concern for others, you will get the same in return. And don't be afraid to be intrusive. It is also necessary to open up internally to new experiences, new acquaintances and new love. 

Source estet-portal.com

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