How many of your acquaintances have moved from provincial cities to the capital or just one of the big cities? How many of them managed to seriously "take root"? Or maybe you – just one of those same visitors? Life in the big city – what is she?
The number of visitors in any metropolis always almost exceeds the number of indigenous people. Everyone goes for something of their own – big money, a dream, an opportunity, a career, a better life. And no matter how many "natives" they didn’t say that the capital is not made of rubber, everyone knows that any metropolis can take in countless people.
However, each of them has their own problems, and sometimes after moving, psychological comfort can only worsen. How to deal with the psychological traps of a big city, to avoid the temptation to return to the province? Read the article estet-portal.com!
Life in a big city – psychological traps of megacities
All of us – different people. And almost everyone has friends with radically different stories of conquering big cities.
There are people who are so ambitious, who are cramped within the provincial framework, that they simply cannot imagine themselves anywhere else outside the capital. Life in a big city suits them more than. It is easy to hear from them: “Home? I will never, ever go back!” The metropolis suits them with all its realities – pros and cons.
And other people can even go to study in the capital or simply conquer its professional peaks, and after a few years go back with the words: "The big city is not for me, I am not able to get used to life in such a rhythm" hellip;
Not everything is clear, of course, with this topic.
1. Deceived expectations.Everyone who goes to the metropolis in pursuit of dreams (in this case, it does not matter what they are), unconsciously manages to draw in the imagination a picture of the future life in the city.
Certain expectations can be formed under the influence of many factors: happy reviews from acquaintances who have successfully settled in the capital, a happy vacation once spent in that very city, and even favorite films or TV shows that take place in this metropolis.
Intellectually, everyone understands that a week of rest in the city of – this is one thing, but permanent life – completely different. But you can't command the subconscious…
Life in a big city is usually different from expectations. At first, a person can be in euphoria from a bright noisy life and wide opportunities. And then comes "sobering up": gray everyday life quickly begins to look like a "race in the wheel"; because of endless traffic jams, indifferent crowds, overcrowding, high competition at work, sky-high prices for living. There is less and less time, money and desire for recreation and entertainment. But disappointment and emotional burnout, on the contrary, is growing. Involuntarily, you will miss your homely cozy town, where almost every street dog is familiar.
The recipe for deliverance is as simple as five kopecks: initially do not build castles in the air in your imagination and don’t really hope for anything (and for anyone other than yourself). Then the surprises will be pleasant, and the people around will not seem like soulless monsters (and it’s just as hard for each of them,
2. Loneliness in the crowd.
Such a feeling, of course, can cover in a small town, but this feeling, like life in a big city, can be swallowed without a trace – at risk to psychological health. Because being among thousands of people every day and realizing that there is practically no one to talk heart to heart with – this is a serious test for any person (unless, of course, we are talking about a severe form of sociopathy). By the way, such a psychological effect in the crowd as the bystander effect is also known, which also does not add optimism to the situation we are talking about in the article. Its essence is that the more people in the crowd see the trouble in which their help is required, the fewer sympathizers will be typed. Got the paradox? The bigger the crowd – the less empathy. And even more help. Psychologists explain this terrible paradox as a sense of shifting responsibility, when everyone subconsciously hopes that someone else will volunteer to help. How to fight? Try to mentally put yourself in the place of individual members of the crowd, highlighting them from the general faceless mass.
After all, the vast majority of them – the same people as you. With the same fears and complexes. Everyone experiences a similar feeling of isolation, and everyone is afraid to take the first step to break the shell of alienation. So maybe it will be you?
How to fight? Try to mentally put yourself in the place of individual members of the crowd, highlighting them from the general faceless mass.
After all, the vast majority of them – the same people as you. With the same fears and complexes. Everyone experiences a similar feeling of isolation, and everyone is afraid to take the first step to break the shell of alienation. So maybe it will be you?
How to fight? Try to mentally put yourself in the place of individual members of the crowd, highlighting them from the general faceless mass.
Just don't be afraid to take the first step and talk to strangers. And feel free to ask for a favor or help. Whoever knocks will sooner or later be opened!
3. The problem of choice.
Life in a big city is like a bright, well-lit showcase of an expensive store: eyes run wide – you don't even know what to choose!
If you are also tormented and brought to the white heat of the flour of choice, conduct a simple experiment – temporarily (for a month, for example) limit the circle of choice to a minimum. Only go shopping at the same supermarket near your house, eat at the same cafe, etc.
There are two options: either you will get involved and even begin to enjoy the monotonous routine (for some people this is a sign of stability), or after the end of the experiment you will sigh with joy and be delighted with the freedom of choice, like never before in your life, feeling like a bird breaking out of a cage. In any case, you will be satisfied.
4. Imaginary luxury and abundance.
Do you think that you can find everything in megacities? Most likely, this is true, but it would be more correct to ask another question: why do you need everything? Do you really need EVERYTHING? After all, this is one of the factors due to which we wasting vital energy
.
The best things are not always bought for money (especially fabulous ones). Watch the indigenous inhabitants of the metropolis: many of them lead a rather modest lifestyle, but do not look unhappy. Life in the big city – it does not mean living in a big store with expensive, mostly useless things.
So instead of looking for a trendy coat in the many shopping malls, try to find out better about the city's best parks, and spend your weekends there, and not on useless expensive shopping. Sometimes a picnic by the city lake with good friends can bring much more pleasant memories than hanging out in a trendy club!
Have a successful conquest of megacities!
Read also: Human loneliness: what is it for and should it be avoided
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