Психологическая зависимость в отношениях:  как не потерять себя

Psychological dependence in relationships – frequent occurrence in modern life. Manifestations of dependent relationships are becoming more frequent as a result of  many factors, one of them – the state of society, the availability of material and spiritual values.  Another important factor in the formation of this phenomenon – parenting mistakes.  Often they are committed subconsciously without knowledge of elementary psychology. Having matured, the child copies, like a matrix, & nbsp; distorted ways of communicating and enters into dependent relationships. At the same time, a person does not feel psychological stability. Getting enough love and proper treatment in childhood – a necessary condition for harmonious development, and then the absence of such problems.

Childhood experiences and psychological dependency in relationships

Some level of dependency is inherent in any social contact. On the basis of this, long-term ties are formed between people with the preservation of their own identity and responsibility for the other. However, quite often it is overkill. In this case, an unhealthy perception of oneself is manifested, which is fueled  another person. The role of the first years of a child's life is invaluable, the experience of which is then broadcast in their own family.

It is desirable that parents understand the importance of the first years of a child's life. It is important not to shift responsibility to others, correcting possible psychological errors. The very beginning of a child's life, spent in a severe, unhealthy delirium, will affect self-doubt. It is also possible a violation of one's own identity, as a result, a psychological dependence on a partner will form. If mistakes have already been made, it is advisable to find the courage to turn to a psychotherapist in order to achieve a positive result.

Dependent relationship as opposed to maturity

The topic of addictions in close, love relationships of a couple is most widely covered. In this case, psychological addiction is fueled by emotional and sexual impressions. However, dependent relationships are also formed in other family ties: mother – daughter; father – son or daughter, business partners. As a rule, a person with addiction can live more harmoniously after a deep understanding of its nature, behavioral manifestations and consequences for life.

What are the deep psychological manifestations of dependent relationships? First of all, this is a violation of personal boundaries, often accompanied by shifting responsibility for one's life to another, "blurring" own life motivations and goals. The person begins to donate  his needs for another , or he himself is increasingly "hanging" their wants and needs to others. In a harmonious union, people are looking for a compromise to meet each other's needs.

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Overcoming dependency – path to identity recovery

Get rid of – the process is lengthy, often requiring constant effort and patience. This path begins with a deep understanding of what is happening, it is better to go through it with a psychotherapist. Often dependent people do not see most of the violations.  Walk the path to awareness –  part of getting rid of it. Restoring your own boundaries – the main thing in the fight against the problem. Remember what you love the most, all your needs and motivations that are buried so deep. Great effort is sometimes required to learn to say "no" partner. Protect your own interests without unnecessary emotions. Learn to love   yourself – step to  respect by others. Overcoming psychological addiction temporarily give up the object of affection in order to listen to your feelings, to recognize them better. Seek help, preferably professionals, to overcome addictive relationships.

Get rid of psychological addiction, because it is – "road to nowhere" with great emotional loss and blockage of feelings. Love yourself, then people around you will also respect you.

In the movement towards harmonious relationships, learn to protect yourself and your own interests. Try to calmly, without shouting and excitement (characteristic of quarrels), point out your needs and interests. & nbsp; Keep your word to the end without succumbing to manipulation. Distance, if possible, the person to whom you have a psychological dependence. On this path, you need to be prepared for a break with a partner, since he was satisfied with only a certain type of contact with you. New relationships can be more harmonious and joyful for you.

Read also: Love or love: from passion to sensual maturity

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