Alain Eril, a French psychoanalyst and sexologist, shares in his books life-affirming and very poetic views on female sexuality. Eril's texts are very useful for women, because in them you can try to recognize yourself, come to an understanding of how to develop sexuality in yourself and become more liberated and desirable.
We bring to your attention the thoughts of a psychoanalyst who summarized his twenty years of experience in order to tell the world about the patterns of development of female sexuality throughout life.
Romanticism. 16-25 years
This period – the time of entry into sexuality. The main goal of the girl is the exact definition of what this sphere of her life will appear in the future, while choosing her stable form fades into the background.
Every time a girl seeks to listen to her emotions and feelings in order to reveal her own sexual potential. During this period, the influence of the experience of childhood and adolescence is still very noticeable, so the protective mechanisms are still in place.
In view of this circumstance, young people are trying to find security in relationships on the one hand, and on the other – adventure.
The main feature of this age is romanticism, manifesting itself in radically different images – it can be both a "Turgenev girl" and a brave conqueror. On the one hand, the girl strives to finally discover and know her own abilities, and on the other – she is carried away by constant dreams that soon she will be lucky enough to meet that same man – gentle, caring, strong, and most importantly, loving, who will be able to awaken in her that very female sexuality.
The benefits of the period: the growth of self-esteem, the desire to attract. Since it is during this period that girls discover the ability to seduce, their self-esteem increases, due to which they are able to accept the need to wait.
Disadvantages of the period: protest, depression, anger. Sexual experience is often accompanied by unsettling feelings and the feeling that a woman is seized by some "powers" that are beyond control. At this age, the girl feels completely inept and awkward, but at the same time courageous.
Creativity: 25-38 years
During this period, emotions stabilize: a woman already knows her own body much better and how to act in order to be in harmony with it. At this age, a woman has often already managed to face strong feelings, so the desire to diversify her sexuality begins to come to the fore.
After 35 years, the “biological clock” begin to reduce sexuality to the goal of procreation.
Now the woman wants to give herself completely to her feelings and open up to herself and her partner.
The advantages of the period: decisiveness and courage. At 30, all you need – just gather all your inner strength and persevere towards your goal.
Disadvantages of the period: impatience and dissatisfaction. If the sexual life of a woman during this period does not find a true and accurate direction, her entire sensual world can be painted in shades of impatience and irritation.
Sensuality: 38-47 years
There comes a time when it is necessary to determine exactly what relationship a woman is in with herself, her body and desire. Concern for procreation recedes into the background, the path to desire and pleasure reopens.
During this period, a woman already manages to create a harmonious relationship with her body and is completely independent of the standards of beauty imposed from the outside. According to numerous studies on the topic of female sexuality, many experience the first orgasm during this period.
In moments of intimacy, a woman listens to herself and her feelings, thanks to which she gains confidence and easily lives her sexuality.
Period Benefits: These years can bring great discoveries. The desire for pleasure awakens in women, they are not afraid to discover something new for themselves, doing it without guilt. There is a need to combine sexuality with spiritual values.
Disadvantages of the period: the first harbingers of menopause occur. The signals of the coming age are irritability and anxiety, decreased libido, vaginal dryness. For this reason, sexual life can become more complicated, a woman feels overwhelmed and depressed, she is haunted by nostalgic memories of the old days.
The search for meaning: 47-50 years
“Countdown” gives impetus to previous years, prompting the need to turn to oneself and analyze one's own past. Summing up, a woman goes through three rather important stages. It may arise to relive the emotions of the young girl she once was. In the next stage, the woman thinks about her partner and decides whether to strengthen the existing relationship or to revise it.
On the threshold of her 50th birthday, a woman again begins to search for her femininity and its relationship with sexuality.
Period Benefits: After a woman has experienced nostalgia for her past, she wants to immerse herself in pleasure again. Such an explosion of feelings and emotions is good for the relationship, as the partner begins to desire his chosen one even more.
Period Disadvantages: Fear of aging can come on. For this reason, some women become insecure and cannot recognize their body as attractive. This entails the loss of sexual desire, which is replaced by the expansion of social ties. Women become quite active – begin to develop creativity and enter into various associations.
Changes: 50-55 years
During this period, the body undergoes tangible changes, libido decreases, menstruation stops. Permanent companions of the tides – anxiety attacks and irritability.
Most women mistakenly believe that at this age it is time to put an end to their sexual life, but there are those who have come to understand that sexuality does not end with the onset of menopause. At this age, women no longer need to prove anything, both to themselves and to their partner.
The main goal – to know the full depth of your pleasure, accepting yourself and your body as it is.
The advantages of the period: emancipation, spiritual clarity. When a woman has managed to accept her body, it will respond to her with vivid and unique sensations. At this age, it is important to part with youth and treat the present calmly, then you will be able to experience some kind of rebirth and fully feel the confidence and fullness of vitality.
Period Disadvantages: Many may desire sensual pleasure but not believe their body is still capable of it.
Version: 55+
Despite the fact that at 65 the body can give a woman certain problems. However, desire still remains a life-giving source for the fair sex at this age, bringing pleasant gifts – postmenopausal orgasms. If by this time a woman has managed to work well on herself internally, she will be able to easily open up to herself and her sexuality.
The advantages of the period: regular care of your body, openness of your own sexuality gives a woman confidence in a life in which there is always room for desire.
Disadvantages of the period: if life has left unhealed wounds on a woman's heart, she can plunge into depression for a long time. Sexuality is considered a forgotten concept, even the very idea that it is still possible to ever experience sexual pleasure seems ridiculous. This is the reason for the complete lack of emotions and inaction.
At any age, it is important to feel self-confidence and completeness, and it is absolutely impossible to achieve such harmony without awareness of one's own sexuality. Work on yourself, loosen up and allow yourself to regularly enjoy life and then each of the periods will only have advantages.
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