Sometimes it is very difficult to find a common language with the baby and choose the right method of education. And even though there are a considerable number of useful and smart manuals on educational topics, where teachers and psychologists explain almost any nuance in this matter (how to respond correctly in a given situation, develop a child, work with his emotions, etc.), nevertheless There are moments about which child psychologists do not cover. What are these parenting secrets that wise books on parenting are in no hurry to reveal? Parsed by estet-portal.com.
Nice to Know: Parenting Secrets That Parenting Books Keep Silent About
It turns out that in some cases it is possible and even necessary to admit to ourselves that uncomfortable and unpleasant moments in a relationship with a child have a right to exist.
You can’t infringe on yourself, your feelings, desires, emotions in some way in order to save the “right face”; in front of the child.
Books on parenting hide that you have the right to lose your temper
Despite the advice of psychologists, under any circumstances, remain completely calm so that the psyche of the child is not injured, you should not forget that parents are not insensitive robots either. What will your child learn if you never express negative emotions? After all, this is not forbidden and it is not necessary to suppress them, otherwise mutual neuroses cannot be avoided.
Of course, you can't use obscene language in front of a child, crush dishes or beat the very culprit of your emotional outburst. But still, the child should see that some of his actions cause a violent reaction in you, but often books on raising children are silent about this.
Show your dissatisfaction – growl, make a disgruntled face, clench your fists, teeth, or leave the room with a warning about the need to cool down – absolutely not forbidden.
At the same time, you can, for example, do push-ups, "beat off" pillows, cry – let the kid see that anger can be thrown out like this – not harmful to anyone – way.
There are times when a baby is impossible to love
No matter how monstrous it may sound, nevertheless, it happens: it is impossible to love your child almost every minute. Of course, you love the heir very much and you will never stop doing it, you promise yourself never to break down on him, to control yourself. However, when a heart-rending cry wakes you up for the hundredth time at night, or you rock a baby in your arms for two hours in a row, who still does not want to fall asleep; when you repeated two hundred times that you can’t eat sand, and the crumb again pulls a full scoop to your mouth, or you went to the bathroom for only 5 minutes, and when you returned, you found that the whole floor was strewn with cereals or flour, endure such “executions”; maybe not any nervous system. Still, do not shame yourself for not experiencing warm parental feelings at such moments. This is a normal, temporary phenomenon.
Asking for forgiveness is not humiliating at all
For many parents, ask for forgiveness from their own child – a very difficult moment in relationships, because it is believed that an adult is always right and understands more about life. But absolutely no one in this world is immune from making mistakes, and parents in this case are no exception. Consequently, sooner or later, but you realize that in one case or another you offended the baby in vain, hurt his feelings, did wrong to him. However, everything is fixable: it's great if you admit the mistake you've made by asking for forgiveness from your child. Thus, your connection with him will remain strong, and the baby himself will learn to act according to his conscience at such moments.
Typically, parenting books inspire parents to raise an ideal, exemplary personality. But we must admit to ourselves: neither we nor our children are perfect.
You need to come to terms with this, with such knowledge you will not demand something unrealistic from yourself and your child, therefore, your relationship will be much calmer, and life – nicer.
Don't reproach yourself and don't have complexes about the fact that sometimes in raising your child something doesn't work out the way it is written in smart books, but be a wise parent. Еstet-portal.com hopes that the above parental secrets will be useful in your educational work.
Read also Why does a baby cry: 6 most common reasons
Add a comment