Each of us at least once faced with critical remarks addressed to him. Unfortunately, they begin to criticize quite early, as soon as the child enters social institutions: a school, an educational institution. The practice of psychologists suggests that parents themselves are most often a source of improperly organized criticism. Wanting the best, family members can make comments, not always controlling its ways and forms. Often, criticism of people can form low self-esteem, unwillingness to become better, to reach the heights in one's own life. It is very important to learn how to correctly present information and also adequately perceive comments.
Criticism of people: its implications for your life
From life observations, the response to critical remarks is usually negative, and sometimes it is associated with a desire to respond in kind, a desire to change this emotion to a positive one. Each of us has a formed idea of ourselves, our strengths and weaknesses. This kind of information contains messages about basic beliefs about yourself, your habits and positive traits. Maintaining self-worth in the eyes of others is necessary for every person. An ancient Indian proverb says: “It is not proper for a wise man to talk badly about another in an assembly.”
Wrongly expressed criticism can lead to changes in the life of a person who is not ready for strong "spiritual shocks". Therefore, it is so important to learn how to correctly present critical information to another person.
It is equally necessary to adequately perceive what others say. After all, criticism of people – this is important information for us, because it contains elements of feedback from them. Acceptance of such information without unnecessary emotions – way to build more harmonious relationships with others.
The key to success: constructive criticism of people
People's perception of criticism can be painful because it is often presented to a person in an insufficiently adequate form. If the remark is expressed disrespectfully, it can cause a feeling of anger, self-doubt. If this is done by a significant enough person in life, such criticism can cause pronounced violations of self-esteem.
Criticism that hits "pain points" is considered unacceptable. This is a direct path to manipulative behavior towards someone who wants to point out a flaw. Respond to such remarks to protect yourself.
Causing difficulties in adaptation in various areas of life, criticism can make a loser out of a person. How, after all, is it correct to express critical remarks so that they reach the addressee and fulfill their function? When setting out to criticize constructively, always start with a good memory, then you can mention what can be slightly improved. Only then can you point out a possible significant drawback. Do not forget to remind at the same time that everything will work out if you really want to. Criticism of people expressed in an arrogant tone, demonstration of signs of superiority is undesirable. Often a remark made in the presence of significant others is deadly.
Subjective perception of criticism: do not harm yourself
Criticism of people by someone is not so terrible as its interpretation, giving it special meaning. "Injections" close and significant person are always more painful and require subjective study. Unfounded reproaches can lead to a process of self-criticism if the person does not know their strengths and weaknesses. In any case, it is desirable to learn to perceive critical remarks as a source of information about yourself, which is so important in interpersonal contacts. In order to adequately receive such messages, even if they are impartial, it is important to first get rid of the illusion that you are perfect. If such information has already been received in one form or another, try to calm down. Experience calmly the first surge of emotions, possible excitement, disagreement with what you heard. It is important to "breathe" and try to see the truth some piece of information with which you can agree. If criticism is obtained in direct contact, try to avoid the effect of "generalization", which is possible in the course of communication, specify what is wrong? This will allow you to more accurately understand what the person is actually dissatisfied with and to calm down somewhat by specifying the situation.
Detail the information as you criticize, not agreeing to perceive it "in general and as a whole." Try to send comments in a constructive way, suggesting ways to overcome the problem.
Criticism is based on the concept of "judge", respectively, to reason, drawing conclusions. When making comments, try not to offend the dignity of a person, those features and characteristics that he considers important for himself. Perceiving dissatisfaction with yourself, try to see it as food for thought and self-improvement.
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