The first few months of life, the child spends most of his time with his mother. She is the one – the closest person to him, replacing the whole world. However, as you grow older comes the need to meet other people. Not all children make it through this stage. Many face fears of strangers. What to do if the child is afraid of people – and can't contact them? The editors of estet-portal.com will talk about how to cope with the fear of strangers and unfamiliar people. This is a problem that requires the participation of not only a psychologist, but also efforts on the part of the parents themselves.
Reasons for a child's fear of communication
For the first time, the fear of strangers and strangers appears in a child at the age of 7-8 months or a little later. At this time, in the category of «strangers» everyone can get in, except for mom and dad. The kid is especially afraid of men, it seems to him that he can be separated from his mother. This is a natural fear, and by the age of two it goes away.
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However, it happens that older children continue to be afraid of strangers. Why this is happening:
1. The narrow circle of communication of the child – if he spends all the time only with his parents, this does not give him the experience of communicating with adults and other children.
2. Fear of other children may appear if the baby has been offended by his peers before. Then he refuses to join the games on the site, but he plays willingly on his own.
3. Fear of men can arise in an incomplete family, where he communicates only with his mother. Also, such fear appears if there is a father, but he shows aggression towards him or his mother.
4. Fear of strangers may appear due to a too anxious or strict mother.
Anyway, to find out the specific cause of your child's problem, you need to contact a specialist. Knowing the cause, it will be much easier to deal with irrational fear and its consequences.
Read also: Why do you have nightmares and how can you cope with them?
The child is afraid of people: what absolutely cannot be done
If you find that your child is afraid of people, it is important to understand – there are a number of taboos in dealing with him. These are actions that will only harm the baby, aggravate the situation. Therefore, remember what you must not do:
1. Do not try to insist on introducing the child to someone else's adult. This will only encourage him to become more withdrawn into himself, the fear will not go anywhere, but will intensify.
2. Try not to show your dissatisfaction with the situation. Yes, there is nothing positive in a child's fear of adults. But this is a problem, first of all, for the baby himself. Don't make it worse with your dissatisfaction. The kid feels it – and such children grow up very stiff and insecure.
3. Do not compare the child with other children who have no problems making contact with adults. This lowers self-esteem, excessive shyness develops.
4. When approaching a stranger on the street, do not show your child your excitement, do not focus his attention on him. Also, do not take your child to another room when guests arrive. This will not solve the problem, and in the future he himself will resort to such tactics.
5. Do not call the child a coward, in no case make fun of it. He must feel the support and protection from the parent.
When meeting strangers, take the child in your arms – it will give him a sense of security. And remember that every child is unique – someone quickly overcomes fear, and someone will need much more time.
Read also: Feelings of Fear and Anxiety: Coping in 5 Steps
Overcoming children's fear: advice from psychologists
First of all, it is worth understanding that the presence of fear of strangers in children – this is the norm. Of course, if without extremes. If a one-year-old child without fear goes into the arms of strangers, does not cling to his mother when they appear, then this is a reason for consulting a doctor. Fear of strangers in one-year-old children – a signal that he has learned to distinguish between familiar and unfamiliar people.
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If, when a stranger appears, the child is too scared , the recommendations of psychologists will be useful to you:
1. Praise your child even for small achievements – he was the first to say hello did not cry when an adult appeared, etc.
2. Children are afraid of the unknown. Therefore, introduce him to people in advance in their absence. Tell about them, show photos or videos. Be sure to call a person by name, emphasize his dignity.
3. Play the situation of meeting or getting to know each other on toys. new toys with old ones in games with the baby. So he will understand that there is nothing wrong with this.
4. Do not rush to send your child to kindergarten. It is better to wait with this until the fears pass. Otherwise, the first day in the kindergarten group will turn into a nightmare for the child, this will definitely not benefit the psyche.
And be sure to warn other family members that the baby is having difficulty communicating. It is important that every person who comes to visit should be attentive to the child and not frighten him even more with his rash actions. 
If a child is afraid of people, then overcoming fear – This is a complex work of all family members, as well as specialists: psychologists, pediatricians. Be patient to help your baby adapt to the adult world!
Read also: Fear of a clown in children: where does it come from
If a child is afraid of people, then overcoming fear – This is a complex work of all family members, as well as specialists: psychologists, pediatricians. Be patient to help your baby adapt to the adult world!
Read also: Fear of a clown in children: where does it come from
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