Sex and childbirth — delicate topics. It s speak with a child difficult, but necessary. When it comes to sex education, many parents worry that after talking with them, their children will immediately try to put everything into practice. You shouldn't be afraid of this. It is much worse if children receive unverified information from other sources. The editors of estet-portal.com invite parents to figure out how to talk with a child about sex, so as not to injure either him or their psyche.
- An age-appropriate way to talk sex with children
- 1.5-3 years: helping a child to know his body
- 4-5 years old: explaining the difference between boys and girls
- 5-7 years: children ask different and often sensitive questions
- 8-9 years: discussing periods and romantics
- 10-15 years old: teenage years — the most difficult
- Information Submission Form — this is important: 7 psychological tips
- The main thing about talking sex with children
How to speak sex with your child in an age-appropriate way
Ideally, the whole process of raising children from a very young age to adolescence should include a sexual aspect. Then there won't be any particular difficulty in discussing intimacy and contraception when the time comes. Even if the baby is only 3 years old, parents should already be ready to talk about sex and childbearing. The main thing is to convey information to children in an accessible form and not injure their feelings.
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1.5-3 years: helping a child to know his body
The baby still has the same attitude to all parts of his body, knows it and does know shame. At this age, it is necessary to explain to the child the name of his organs, including intimate ones. Avoid a common parenting mistake: don't come up with some weird special name for the genitals. Otherwise, the child may decide that there is something wrong with these parts of the body.
4-5 years old: explaining the difference between boys and girls
Babies are already beginning to realize their gender. They know that boys and girls are different, they can ask sensitive questions about the "missing" or "superfluous" body parts of members of the opposite sex. It is very important right now to explain the basics of decency and sexual safety, to say that:
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Interesting in one's genitals is normal.There is nothing shameful about he.
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Other people should not see each other's genitals. They should should be covered with panties, swimsuits.
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No one should touch the baby's genitals.Exception — parents and doctors examining the genitals for the subject of skin diseases.
Children are already interested in childbearing issues. They need to talk about pregnancy and delivery in an accessible form. Be prepared for the child to ask how he got into the tummy of mom and how he got out.
Read also: Raising Teenagers: 10 Rules for Wise Parents
5-7 years: children ask different and often sensitive questions
Child sees uncles and aunts kissing in movies, observes manifestations of tenderness between parents. Gradually, he begins to realize the fact of sexuality and its relationship with childbirth. At this age, it is important to talk about the feelings that connect adults with each other. It is now that ideas about love are being formed, the foundations of family values are being laid.
8-9 years: discussing periods and romantics
Children begin to ask questions about how their meet feeling mom and dad. Be prepared to answer. Keep in mind that girls may have their first menses early and they must be prepared. It should be carefully told about how growing up manifests itself, so that the girl is not afraid of blood stains and pain in the stomach, if they appear.
10-15 years: adolescence — the most difficult
Girls should already know about menstruation, and boys about dream. They can ask a variety of questions about & nbsp; manifestations of sexuality, including & nbsp; same-sex. It's time to explain how boys and girls get to know each other, fall in love. It's time to delineate the boundaries of acceptable manifestations of sympathy.
It's worth considering how to talk to sex with children so that he is ready for discussions between peers and soaks unverified, potentially harmful information. By 14-15 years, an educational program on contraception should be carried out.
Read also: How to explain divorce to children: practical recommendations from child psychologists
Information Submission Form — this is important: 7 psychological tips
Parents need to be ready to talk about sex. To do this, you need to read at least one book about the age characteristics of the perception of children, decide which names can be used. Follow the advice of psychologists:
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Speak the truth. The child must trust you. So forget the tales of the stork and cabbage.
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Call a spade a spade. A very young child will be satisfied with the answer that he lived in the tummy of then and was born. The older he gets, the more detailed information he should receive from parents. Don look for euphemisms for genitals or intimacy.
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Don't get ahead of the curve.Sex Education — long process. The child should receive information in portions. Don't overload it with details, but answer all questions when they come up.
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Take a break when the questions make you numb. Sometimes it's better to think before answering. If you don't know how to phrase it, tell your child about it, promise to return to the topic later, and be sure to keep your word.
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Speak about love. The child must understand that the parents loved each other very much before they wanted children. This will help the child to realize the connection of love, sex and procreation.
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Use books and movies. If you find it difficult to discuss sensitive topics, feel embarrassed, don force yourself. Choose a high-quality educational film and invite your child to watch it with you.
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NDon't hush up anything. As much you'd like to hide from inconvenient topics, talk to the child about everything that interests him. He will find out anyway, and it will be bad if not from you.
Good option — involvement of competent people in the sex education of the child. If you have the opportunity, ask doctors, relatives with medical education to explain difficult topics. Surely you will also be interested in listening.
Read also: Friendships with children: where to draw the line
The main thing about talking sex with child
The quality of sex education in the family largely determines what values and priorities will guide your child in the future. Don avoid uncomfortable conversations. To convey information correctly, follow these rules:
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Age-wise. You shouldn't force things and lecturing a five-year-old kid about intimate relationships. But if he asks further questions, mention sexual relationships, saying that loving men and women sleep in the same bed, children are born from this
Never lie. As however shackled you feel, do deceive the child and do invent specific words for sexual organs or sex.
Take pauses, get ready for talk about sex.If you don don't know how to answer a child question, postpone the conversation and return to it later, but after special preparation.
Talk about love. This is archival. Your child needs to understand that love, sex and childbirth — phenomena of the same order. Talk about fidelity, family values.
Use additional sources. Watching an educational movie together will do a great job of getting the message across and bringing you closer to the child. This will help you to communicate with a teenager in comprehensible language using the correct names of organs and processes.
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