Happy family life: the most common myths

When entering into marriage, many young couples draw before themselves rosy pictures of a happy family life, long cloudless days spent together right up to old age. Often, already during the first year of living together under the same roof, this theory crashes, because the notorious life can undermine even the strongest and most lasting relationships. Exaggerated requirements for a partner and unjustified expectations lead to the fact that "com" claims and discontent grows, thereby alienating people close to each other. How to save a marriage and what to do so that for your couple a happy family life becomes not a myth, but a reality, read on the estet-portal. com.

Myth 1. Everything will be like in the movies

Drawing on the experience of our parents, we expect the same decisions and actions from the other half, sometimes not even guessing about our unconscious behavior. In addition, the formation of a model of behavior in the family is influenced by the books, films read, and, undoubtedly, – experience of familiar couples.
To make your family life comfortable and happy, you should not be guided by the opinions of people around you who consider themselves real experts in the field of family relations. Forget about the notorious myths that lead many young couples astray. Remember that only you are the smiths of your happiness, and the harmony of family life depends on you.

Myth 2. Having a baby will make a marriage stronger

The appearance of the first-born – This is a real test for every family. A young mother during the period of breastfeeding gives all her love and warmth to the child, while her feelings for her husband do not cool down, but only transform, acquiring a deeper meaning. Due to the lack of free time, with all her desire, a woman cannot pay due attention to the father of the child, thereby moving away from him. As the baby grows up, everything will fall into place, but this applies to families in which everything was smooth and quiet before the birth of the child. If a black cat ran between the young spouses, it will not be easy to correct the situation with the birth of a child.

Myth 2. There can be no secrets between partners

This is an erroneous opinion, under the influence of which many young families fall. The reason for this behavior is jealousy, and the desire to control every step of the partner. Remember that a happy family life is built on respect and trust. Just mentally put yourself in the place of a partner. Would you like total control?
Each partner should have his own "personal space". Hobbies, hobbies, personal free time, meeting only with your own, not mutual friends – all this will help cement the union, support the interest of the spouses in each other.

Myth 3. We understand each other without words

Your partner – not a magician and a wizard, but a simple person like you, with his own strengths and weaknesses, problems and complexes. In any incomprehensible situation, speak out the problem, find out all the nuances at the very beginning, this will help prevent future quarrels and misunderstandings.
In real life, you need to learn to voice your claims, grievances or misunderstandings. And do it delicately — real art, which is not so easy to comprehend, but absolutely necessary for a long and happy family life.

Myth 4. Desire to remake a partner: I blinded you...

This delusion can bring a lot of disappointment and seriously complicate the life of you and your "half". At the beginning of a relationship, it may seem that you can easily polish some of the “roughness” of your character. However, this usually does not happen.

Two full-fledged personalities enter into marriage, each of which has its own needs and desires, views on life and interests. You fell in love with a person with a certain set of qualities, both positive and negative, so you should not try to change your partner according to your "vision".

At first, you may even succeed, but eventually your loved one will get tired of training and a barrier will arise between you in the form of alienation.

Myth 5. Love boats still crash against everyday life

Very often, newly-made husbands want to see their wives in the kitchen as round-the-clock cooks, while refusing to do men's housework. In addition, a modern, well-established life in a city apartment practically excludes "male duties."
In order not to lead relations into a dead end with mutual claims, you can try to make a plan or simply agree on exactly how all household chores will be distributed. Thus, young spouses will know their duties, and there will be no place for groundless quarrels on a domestic basis in a relationship.
Domestic problems cannot be avoided, and with the advent of children in a family, they become even more. Therefore, it is necessary to learn not only to voice your claims, but also to hear your loved one. Then even the most difficult everyday problems will not interfere with your happiness. Myth 6. Family problems: do you need an arbitrator

All quarrels and misunderstandings must be resolved within the family. The erroneous belief that relatives and friends will help smooth out the conflict between spouses often leads to its even greater aggravation.

However, what if mutual grievances build a wall of misunderstanding between you? In such situations, you need not just an objective opinion, but qualified help from a specialist. If you value relationships despite conflicts, visit a family psychologist.

Involving relatives and friends in the showdown, you will only aggravate the situation, because choosing a "vest" into which you can "cry" your family problems, you most likely will not choose the most objective person.

When seeing married couples with experience, many young couples categorically do not want to accept the fact that someday they may also be affected by problems. During the period of falling in love, it seems that the relationship will always be bright and trouble-free, but this is not so. Crises are inevitable, the main thing – to go through them with dignity and draw the necessary conclusions.

Besides, it would not be superfluous to get acquainted with this phenomenon on other people's examples. We are talking about both special literature and fiction. Agree, it is much easier to cope with a difficult situation, having received at least general ideas about it.

As you can see, a happy family life – This is a consequence of the titanic work of both spouses. For your successful coexistence, it is necessary to develop rules that will be acceptable specifically for your family. Remember that the success of this enterprise is in your hands, and only the two of you will be able to build an ideal family nest with its correct way of life.
You can always read more about the relationship between men and women on the estet-portal. com.

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