Toxic people among friends: what to do with them

You've probably heard the expression "toxic people". But not always wondered what that meant. In any case, associations with this term are not the most pleasant: poison, chemicals, toxic substances. All this in a psychological sense can refer to a person who poisons the lives of others. It is especially difficult when such people are among friends and relatives.

The editors of estet-portal.com will tell you how to understand that your friend — a toxic person, and how to minimize energy loss.

• Are there are there toxic friends in your environment: how to determine it
• Toxic people among friends: how to communicate with them
• Your social circle determines your worldview

Are are toxic friends in your environment: how to determine it

You are bound by many years of friendship. But one day you understand that meetings with friends become painful, you want to end them quickly, your bad mood doesn let go long after the conversation. In this case, it is worth analyzing how this person affects you.

The main manifestations of toxic friends that are almost impossible to correct:

• Pessimism. A toxic person perceives his entire life as a continuous stream of failures. He perceives everything around him in gloomy tones, and nothing can convince him. In addition, this person is trying to drag you into the pool of discontent. He constantly proves that things aren not as good as you think. Your friend talks about it so often that you involuntarily think: “maybe my life is really worse than I think.”

• Control over other people's lives. A toxic person has control over your life. You yourself do not notice how you begin to tell him the latest events. Try not to do this. The reaction will be immediate. Such a friend will begin to take offense and accuse you of secrecy and insincere friendship. The pressure will be so strong that you will start making excuses.

• Dissatisfaction in fulfillment of desires. A toxic friend doesn just ask you for a a favor, he demands. Everything is not enough for him: love, attention, money, clothes, etc. He always complains and gives claims to friends, relatives, the state.

• Denial and devaluation. A toxic person criticizes everything whatever you talk with he . He has everything with a minus sign: the idea is immature, the desire is unrealistic, the thought is bad, everything that is done is done wrong, etc.

• Comparing to others. Notice that your friend is constantly comparing himself to others. And this identification each time is not in in           favor of             &nbp;&nbp;&nb;;&nb;;&nb;&r; He endlessly says that to be successful he has worse living conditions.

• Accusations. Such a person is always looking for someone to blame: circumstances, boss, parents, friends. A toxic person will always find an excuse why he didn't keep his promise, didn come to the meeting, didn succeed. You every time believe his assurances, and every time he doesn keep his word.

• Rejection of help. You want to help your old friend, support him in a difficult situation, offer a solution to the problem. But he always declines your help. Because he is comfortable in his failures. If you still persistently try to change the life of a toxic person, then he will have nothing to complain about. He will find plenty of reasons to stop supporting support.

• Conflict. A toxic person can start a fight for no reason. At the same time, he wants constant communication and demands your attention.

If you find at least 2-3 of the signs listed, know — you have a toxic comrade in front of you.

Read also: How to calculate a manipulator: recognizing by actions and methods of influence

Toxic people among friends: how to communicate with them

If you recognize a toxic person among your inner circle, then the question immediately arises: "What to do? After all, this is a close person, you have a long-term relationship and you can refuse them».

Toxic friends or relatives require constant attention. Imposing yourself — This is their comfort zone. During the interaction, they set traps for you on a subconscious level and get pleasure from it. Communication with "poisonous" people is like walking through a minefield. Your friendship may go smoothly for a while, but there comes a moment when there is an explosion and an unpleasant situation. If you do not use defensive techniques, then this pattern will be repeated systematically.

Read also: When it is worth limiting communication with relatives and why it is important

Of course, it's best to stop talking to   —— this is the perfect way out. But it doesn not always work out that way. The editors of estet-portal.com have selected for you some psychological tips that will help to minimize the negative impact of toxic friends.

• Establish diplomatic relations. This forced interaction will avoid open confrontation.

• Don't be fooled by the manipulations of a toxic person, don display negative emotions. Such people are skillful manipulators. They can get any information from you. You complain    of a friend, boss, or parents. A toxic person will first sympathize, then devalue, and then use your revelations against you.

• Don't respond immediately to a toxic person.If he brought you to negative emotions, don show your reaction right away, don feed his ego. Disengage, cool off, and only then answer the phone call or message.

• Don't drink with toxic friends. When a person drinks alcohol, they slow down their cerebral cortex, becomes more open and shows the emotions that a toxic person needs so much. As M. Zoshchenko wrote: “Comrade, don’t drink!” With drunk eyes you can hug a class enemy». This is perfectly true when associating with toxic people.

• Don't get drawn into long conversations, know how to end contact in time.For example, when you are going to call a friend or close relative, immediately determine the duration and conversation plan: congratulations on holiday, wished all the best and finished dialog. Ability to end a conversation on time — a great boon in  associating with unpleasant people.

• Don't appraise third parties with toxic people. This is a special manipulation that these complex personalities are very fond of. They specifically provoke you to express a critical opinion. But there will definitely come a moment when your views will be conveyed to the person being discussed. Moreover, people who slandered others will definitely speak negatively about you. Avoid  this ambiguous situation: take the conversation in a different direction  But don't touch topics that evoke a deep emotional response.

• Don't use the help of a toxic friend.He will will support you, but then it will be difficult for to repay him. Whatever you do in answer, it will not be enough for him. Find another resource to solve your problems.

• Limit the time of communication. When dealing with toxic people, time is of the essence. When you have to go to meet a a a a a meeting time, you can make time. Warn in advance that you have urgent business and you have an hour to communicate.

The social circle determines your worldview

After hanging out with toxic friends, switch to something good. This is light music, fascinating reading & nbsp; and, of course, pleasant communication. Surround yourself with positive people. They will help to painlessly get out of an unfavorable situation and positively look at the world.

Read also: How to end a destructive relationship: 4 steps to emotional freedom

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